I See You

A beautiful poem, I stumbled upon

Veracious Poet

hearder image

I see you.

In the midst of thousands of sayers,

I see you.

I only pretend I am not looking but

I see you.

You speak of homes and pools and flowers.

You speak of pain, sorrow and disappointments.

Still, you shine like a diamond.

I just don’t know what to say to you;

(I enjoy your photos).

Maybe we can begin with a dialogue

And see where the road leads.

No one can compete with you

For my attention.

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Thank You Maa!

When I fell, you held me tight,

When I cried, you wiped my tears

You would gauge my restlessness by my voice.

You fed me, when I was not hungry,

I was alone, without friends, but you were there

You were up before sunrise, and I reached school on time.

When I told you about my first and last break-up,

You told me I shouldn’t be crying for those who do not care

I learnt how to value relations and yet be positive, from you maa.

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It was my turn to look after you, 
to hold you, when you fell

Support you, Nurse you, Feed you and Wash you

Was it a cleansing ritual or a role reversal?

Between two souls it was communicated silently.

After thirty-eight days you walked out of the hospital, without an assistive support

My admiration for your fighting spirit, maa increases day by day.

I have learnt that you can be me but I can never be you.

— Dedicated to my mother on her 61st Birthday!

An Alternative

We met, we spoke, and we connected well.

And then we met again, with feelings strong that wouldn’t quell

We touched, kissed and hugged each other.

As if there was nothing in this world that would bother

Then there came a time, when things were replaced.

There was dislike (the time, days, minutes, and seconds) and distaste

Dried, tanned, rough, brown – marks on the beach,

Left by wayward waves, language lost with the speech

not

Reduced. A beautifying wall painting to a poster.

There was an alternative and an old proprietor…

A Moment of Togetherness

When the heart swells, eyes moisten

And the mind wanders in the dark corridors of hopelessness,

A moment of togetherness, rekindles life.

When I walk alone, repent on what I have done and on what I should have done

A wandering gypsy, without a cause, I become, alone, agitated, apprehensive;

In times such, a moment of togetherness helps.

When I try to talk, listen, pray, When questions are seen but answers, rarely found.

I see the my self-created dream, beautiful dream creased, crushed, wrinkled in dust.

A moment of togetherness, appears like a grace.

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When I try to live, do things mechanically,

Try to connect with a few and the fear of losing it all over again grips me;

That one moment of togetherness embraces me.

I with my shattered self, try to find a meaning,

It is then that the moment of togetherness defines my new.

To my dearest friend…

The chatter, talks, laughter and giggle,

With you, it was as if moments drip and dribble.

 

I wish there was a way,

To tell you, what my silences hardly convey.

 

Our differences, limitations, liabilities and strife,

Hardly enhance this listless life.

 

But like lost friends, we have met after years,

There must be a reason why we connect like seers.

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Your dark past clouded your present,

But friendship showed a beautiful light of crescent.

 

No words or explanations friends ever need,

They never stop, start, begin or ever leave.

 

Whatever it is, whatever it may be,

It’s beautiful always when it’s we!

 

A war- lost, a war won!

‘Patrick Nicholas Auben do you take Stella Jerome Kaye as your beloved, your other half, your wife?’

‘I do’, said Patrick

‘And Stella what about you?’

‘I do. I will always do.’

Such was the love and faith that both had in each other. Stella did not even wait for the priest to complete before saying I do. But all this was three years ago. Stella could hardly forget Patrick’s voice. It was with her. She could hear it again and again. She just had to wait now for Patrick’s letter from the frontier.

‘Very strange she didn’t even realise that she is pregnant. Couldn’t she feel the change?,’ asked the doctor.

I do, I do! Stella suddenly realised that she was with her mother and her gynaecologist.

‘Mum I have to go, I can’t have this child, I must talk to Pat.’

Relax dear, and do not fret. There’s developing news form the army head quarters, Pat would be shuffled.’

Patrick was on the war front, and Stella in his thoughts She had not even known that she had entered the first trimester, until her mother and her maid realised. She had always stood for her love.

‘It doesn’t matter if you are a Syrian Christian and I a Roman Catholic. Love sees no limitations. The chosen ones get an opportunity to live, to love and we are one of them, Stella.’

‘But where is love? I don’t see love anywhere Patrick. I find it nowhere.’

‘I see it in your search, I see it in your eyes and I see it in your belief. Your belief to prove that love is non-existent, proves that love never stays, forever just like a scent that cannot be seen but can surely be felt.’

Stella had ultimately found love. But she wanted to know how well did Pat love her.

‘I’ve been to different countries and continents and I used to wonder how would I relate to diverse people? After knowing their ways I realised I was too small to teach them co-existence, harmony and love. They once gave me a piece of bread. I couldn’t eat it properly, as I found a few black spots that the earthen oven had left behind. I did not savour the meal rather, I tried to remove them. In this way I lost an opportunity to enjoy a fresh and hot meal, as I magnified a small issue and never gave that up till I realised the mealtime was over.

She was up and awake now. Memories held her tight, she had to write to Patrick. Thuraya, gprs, satellite was everything useless now, a mockery of modernity. The remote country could not receive the Sat signals.

‘Mrs. Kaye, Stella’s case is getting complicated. She is still bleeding. We hope there’s no need for an abortion, but we fear we must give it a try or it would be too late. The foetus seems to be not implanted in the uterine wall. To be honest it is an ectopic pregnancy and it is not an easy one’, said the doctor.

Stella waited for Patrick’s reply. She wanted to have Patrick’s child, was he aware too?

A letter followed…

‘Dearest love, the day was as usual we had to roam around the town, another step as a confidence building measure for civilians. We still, are unable to win their trust. I had salmon and sandwiches but miss the turkey dearly. I can’t say when I will be “there” for you and our child. But a little bit of me is always in you. Lots of love…for us.’

–SG Patrick.

Tring Tring Tring Tring Tring Tring Tring

‘Stella? Can I come over darling?’

‘I am absolutely fine mum; though I have a back ache and little morning sickness. Please do not worry. Bye bye.’

‘What’s wrong with this girl? She was so sweet and meek before her marriage. And now she is not ready to listen. Jerome, please ask your daughter to take care, please.’

‘Hermoine, she is growing dear. She is strong and she will be fine. My only worry is Pat not being around.’

‘Pat was to be shuffled, isn’t it?’

‘Yes…’

Another letter followed…

‘My love, the peace process is very fragile and the bombardments are an every day affair. i am fine and so are my colleagues. lots of love to you and our child.

–sg.p.a.

And another one…

‘My love I know you would need me, there are others who can very well take my place in your life but I would not like to betray anyone right now. For you and for you’re my land, I can give my life again and again.

–sgpa

‘But what about us, you have already proved yourself. You have been to many war fronts. You have negotiated in the peace process of Africa well. Why again? Why there? Why now?’

Stella was right. She had waited for two years for marriage. And soon followed another parting. It was difficult for Stella to forget those moments when she actually started living.

She was re-reading the lines that were imprinted on torn piece of paper. The words in her mind. . Love understands love. Yes, it does but there are times, when you think your minstrel heart finds no resort.

‘Madam, your soup.’

‘I am sorry, love but I want to say that I love thudd! thaar! The dark silence arrives now. Aee-ooww, aee-ooww. I can barely see anything yet i managed to d/scribble a word or two. For

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Nurse quickly come here! Its critical, no not second trimester….

‘Mum, those sirens and cries. What are they?’

‘Nothing darling, Pat’s letter…’

‘Congratulations, Mrs Kaye the twins are fine!

To my,

Dearest gal, friend, wife and mother.I know uncertainty kills but our life like a pendulum, sometimes belongs neither here nor there. Till the time this letter reaches you, perhaps I may not…

‘Stella, Stella, my darling you…’

‘I am sorry Mrs Kaye.’

An Old Man

A man ripe and old

With eyes fierce and bold,

White robes, white hair and tall;

Was nimbly treading the ground

Had he no one to hear and call.

 

He was white in and out,

No fear had he no doubt,

I called him aloud, entreating kindly

Pleading him to allow me, to follow him,

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As I wished to blindly

Broad was he, bare chested,

As a brown falcon crested,

Astonishing, amorous, ferocious to sight

He said he was a master of speed and pace

And I knew I could match up his white.

 

Speeding up, around and sides, what a flight we had hand in hand!

As if, we were some cosmic band

We traversed the depth and scaled the heights

Fair and unfair on the land, surface, in the ocean and sea,

With him around, I had pure day and night.

 

Sea of fire, killed the desire,

Free flowing in air, like thread bare,

Tying loose ends was neither a consideration nor a choice

Waters touching sky and clouds running low; fishes flying, while birds swimming, was this an illusion or was this so?

I stop it there and speak without voice.

 

Death, destruction; creation and construction,

A sign of creation and annihilation

I sensed and saw some or none

Standing still, calm with a strong will,

I had everything and nothing to shun.

 

I open my eyes to end the surprise…